Being a parent is tough now a days. With all the drugs, sex, and pedophiles kids have a lot on their plate and are more stressed than ever. So every week I will give you a new tip on how to effectively raise your child to be the kind of person you wanted to be.
Tip #1: Showing kids who's the boss.
I know what you are thinking right off the bat but this isn't Family Guy so keep the Tony Danza references to your self. Anyway, with all the politically correct BULL SHIT over the past 20 years or so it has become ever so difficult to strike fear into a childs heart. You aren't supposed to hit them and they hardly understand most of the insults and swear words you use when yelling at them.
However there are simple words they do understand like "Fault" and "Yours" and don't forget classics like "unwanted" and "mistake".
Let me give you some examples of how we can use these words to deal with a child that is acting out.
Child: My belly hurts.
SuperDad: That's your fault.
Child: I puked on the carpet.
SuperDad: God Damn it! I never even wanted kids! You were a mistake.
Child: I'm sorry.
SuperDad: Sorry isn't going to change the fact that your mother is going to have to clean up a pile of puke when she gets home from work in 6 hours.
Child: Wah! Wah! Wah!
The Child is now in tears and in their room out of sight and will soon be fast asleep as long as they didn't puke up the mickey you slipped em. Now you just sit back, relax, have some beers, and smoke some cigarettes to help cover up the smell of child vomit at the foot of the couch.
Til' Next Time
SuperDad
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