Don’t take the Christ out of X-mas.

Don’t take the Christ out of X-mas.

I hate when people are like “Keep the Christ in Christmas or Christmas is too commercial.” Shut up you Charlie Brown watching no fun having bag o’ douche.
The only good part of Christmas is being greedy and materialistic.

You wanna worship the birth of our lord then be my guest but I am drinking eggnog and watching creepy clay-mation Christmas specials from the 60’s about a red nosed reindeer that flies and helps elf’s follow their dreams of becoming dentists that will probably end up telling some handsome male elf he needs a root canal and once he puts he gives him the anesthesia he molests him because if Hermey had a hard time telling people he wanted to be a dentist there is no way he is going to be able to admit he is gay. So he just molests all of his male patients. He gets away with it for years too and when he is finally caught there is nothing they can do because it is the North Pole and their isn’t a government and therefore no rules. He does end up on Santa’s naughty list, which is fine by him because he uses the lump of coal as a butt plug.

I do not support the distribution of misfit toys though. All the kids that get the misfit toys are going to think Santa has to shop at Marshall’s. What dick move by Santa. “Hey kids here’s a train with square wheels, maybe you can push it around the hard wood floors and scratch the shit out of them and hope your father doesn’t beat you with his belt buckle.”